My Birth Stories

My First Birth

I had hoped for a natural birth with my first pregnancy, but that plan quickly unraveled the moment I arrived at the hospital. I considered a local birth center, but they didn’t accept my insurance so I decided to stay with the OB/GYN I'd seen since I was 18. I took an online childbirth class focused on natural birth in the hospital setting. I felt confident I could birth naturally in the hospital with the support of my husband and nurses—though looking back, that was a bit naïve. I labored with intense sensations in my back throughout, eventually getting an epidural at 8 cm. What started as a natural birth turned into a cascade of interventions: Epidural, Pitocin, my water being broken, and lots of waiting.

Although my baby and I were physically safe, emotionally, the experience fell short. I felt alone in the moments after her birth. I had planned for delayed cord clamping, but the doctor accidentally cut the cord early. The golden hour of skin-to-skin didn’t happen. Nurses said they’d be quick so we could have time alone, but by the time I held her, she was swaddled in a blanket and cap, already overstimulated from checks and procedures. She was too exhausted to breastfeed, so I began pumping and syringe-feeding instead. After a long night of labor and little rest, I was overwhelmed and depleted.

Even now, I reflect on that birth knowing it wasn’t what I envisioned and deep down, I know it wasn’t what was best for me or my baby.

My Second Birth

For my second pregnancy, I chose a local birth center with a team of four midwives and a birth doula. I saw each of them throughout my prenatal care. This pregnancy was more physically challenging than my first; worse nausea, leg cramps, insomnia, and Braxton Hicks starting at 28 weeks, all while caring for a toddler. Still, I was committed to a natural birth. I did a deep dive into physiological birth to educate myself on what to expect. I sought out evidence-based care, focused on posture, got bodywork, and leaned deeply into my faith. I knew it was a mental game and I worked on my mindset—to fully surrender and trust in Him to take care of me and my baby. I prayed often, envisioned a peaceful birth, and felt more prepared than ever.

Labor started with discomfort in my low back around 4 PM. Due to my previous back labor, I hoped the discomfort in my back was pre-labor, but the sensations intensified. After laboring at home and managing contractions in the shower, we headed to the birth center around 8 PM. The 30-minute ride was tough, but things picked up again shortly after arriving. I labored mostly on hands and knees and in the tub. The water helped a little, but the contractions were stronger than I expected. My husband did hip squeezes the entire time, and while I kept breathing through each wave, I struggled to relax. Still, I knew I could do it. When I doubted myself, I’d remember why I chose this path.

I had been pushing with each urge and eventually agreed to a cervical check, though I didn’t want to know how far along I was. They suggested breaking my water, and I agreed, not realizing how long I’d already been laboring. After that, contractions intensified even more. I had a cervical lip; something I’d read about and previously decided I’d prefer not to have manually moved. When asked if they could move it, I stayed silent, hoping they'd forget. Eventually, I voiced my hesitation, and the second midwife suggested a different position to help it move naturally. It worked, and soon after they encouraged me to get out of the tub and onto the bed to start pushing.

I was hesitant to move, exhausted and unsure, but hopeful it meant progress. On the bed, they suggested I get on my side and hold one knee to my chest. This position was so uncomfortable! I was pushing but I knew it wasn’t effective due to how uncomfortable it was. This was the moment I started questioning if I could do this, common with transition. If I had to push my baby out in this position, I wasn’t sure how I could do it. Then they suggested I lie flat on my back, which is different than the position I birthed in before, as in the hospital your upper body is typically tilted in a 45 degree angle. Being on my back felt much better and my pushes became stronger. Her head crowned, and I felt a rush of excitement—she was almost here! In the next few contractions her head came out but I felt it go back in. They asked me to push again and keep pushing but her body didn’t follow. The midwife quickly instructed me to get on my hands and knees. I flipped over, pushed with everything I had, and felt her maneuvering around my baby. Finally, I felt a release—she was out.

I collapsed onto my hands, praying aloud, unsure what had just happened. My husband was right there with me. As I prayed, I felt peace wash over me. I knew God was present, and our baby would be okay. A few minutes later, I turned around and spoke to her: “Hey baby girl, mommy’s here—daddy’s here too, he’s just being quiet as usual.” Everyone laughed. She began crying and fighting the oxygen mask—she was strong and alert by this point. I held her soon after, and she latched on right away.

We stayed at the birth center for monitoring. The care I received was deeply supportive. My doula brought me tea, comforted me, and reminded me of my strength through it all. The midwives debriefed with us afterward and checked in beyond that. It was unlike anything I experienced before.

My baby had shoulder dystocia—her shoulders got stuck during delivery. Because of this, emergency services were called to be on stand-by. They were there within a few minutes and literally stood by until all was well. She weighed 9 lbs, 1 oz, and while size can contribute to shoulder dystocia, there’s no way to predict it. My midwife’s skill in maneuvering her out likely prevented an emergency cesarean, which might’ve been the outcome in the hospital.

Though my birth didn’t go exactly as planned, it was deeply redemptive and healing. I know God used it to strengthen my faith and trust in Him. We were safe, and I didn’t have to leave the birth center—something I’d really hoped to avoid. Our baby is happy (she smiles all the time!) and healthy. My birth story is a perfect reminder that God is in control, He will never leave you, and you’re safe with Him.